Back to December
by x.Xtreme Beauty.x
Summary: She lost all that mattered the most in a December... and it took her a year to realize it and try to piece everything back together. The thing is, will be want to be with her again? Jeff/Lexi One-Shot


**A/N: This is for Lex, she has a lot on her plate and I just want to get her mind off of everything.**

_I'm so glad you made time to see me... How's life, tell me how's your family? I haven't seen them in a while..._

"I'm so glad you came." Lexi arose from her place in the booth she was sitting at. She latched onto him tightly.

He squeezed her tightly. "Why wouldn't I have come?"

_I could think of a few reasons_, Lexi thought. She faked a laugh instead of saying that, then she said. "True." The two sat down in the booth.

A waiter came over and took their order of drinks, after he left they were left to talk to each other.

"So, how's life?" Lexi asked.

Jeff swallowed the sip of Coke he just took. "Pretty good. Livin' the dream, ya know?"

She nodded. "Yeah. How's Matt and The Legend?" Lexi had missed them so much; Jeff's family was so much like her own family. She hadn't seen them in the longest time.

"They're great. Dad's really proud of everything Matt and me are doing, and Matt's just glad to be living the dream like me." Jeff thought about everything for a moment and smiled.

_You've been good, busier than ever. We small talk, work and the weather... Your guard is up and I know why..._

The sight of Jeff's smile made Lexi smile briefly. "How's 'living the dream' though? Hours long?"

He nodded. "Very. I've been busier than ever. The business is brutal, but its my life and I couldn't love it anymore."

"Well that's good." She said. She really didn't know what else to say... there were a lot of things she _wanted_ to say but she knew she wouldn't.

After a long period of silence, Jeff decided to say something. "It's pretty fuckin' cold out there." He pretended to shiver.

Lexi laughed. "You just forgot about this weather up here I guess."

"You got that right." He laughed a little, then everything became quiet again.

Lexi blew air out of her mouth, then she picked up her cup and took a long sip of her Diet Coke. She was wondering why she even invited Jeff there now; well she knew, but she knew she wasn't going to fix anything.

_Because the last time you saw me, I still burned in the back of your mind... You gave me roses and I left them there to die._

"You've changed." Jeff caught Lexi's attention.

She gave him a weird look. "How so?"

He just shrugged. "You're just not the same anymore."

"'Cuz I'm not a bitch anymore?"

Jeff laughed. "You were never a bitch..."

Lexi rolled her eyes, then she picked up her purse and took out some money and put it down on the table. "That should cover everything... now come on lets go." She stood up then she pulled Jeff out of the other side.

"Where are we going?" He asked as she pulled him out the door.

"Just... for a walk." She told him.

As they walked everything got quiet, leaving Lexi to think. Even though she was with Jeff at the moment, she couldn't stop thinking of how they were before.

_These days I haven't been sleeping, staying up playing back myself leaving... When your birthday passed and I didn't call..._

She thought of all of the nights she stayed up, dreaming of this moment where she could tell Jeff everything and how she felt... and she had the perfect moment to right now... but instead she continued to think about the way things could have been, instead of the way they actually went.

"Whatcha doing?" Jeff questioned, while she remained silenced for quite awhile.

He broke her from her thoughts, making her sigh. She looked over at him and locked eyes with him. "I'm sorry that I didn't call you last month..."

He raised an eyebrow. "For my birthday?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

Jeff waved his hand. "Don't be."

_Then I think about summer all the beautiful times... I watched you laughing from the passenger side... And realized I loved you in the fall... And when the cold came, the dark days When fear crept into my mind. You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye..._

Lexi continued to think of absolutely everything... how they met in the spring, began dating in the summer, fell in love in the fall, and then broke up in the winter... it was funny how the seasons changed them.

Jeff sighed quietly... it was bothering him of how quiet she was being. "Lexi, are you okay?"

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before looking at him again. "Yeah, I'm fine... I'm just still thinking."

"About?" He looked into her eyes as he asked.

She couldn't deny his eyes. "Summer, fall, and winter." She took another deep breath. "It's funny how we were so close in the summer, fell in love in the fall, then as soon as the cold, and bitter winter days came around... we broke up." She started to choke up a little bit.

"Hey, its okay." He hugged her tightly.

_I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right... And now you held me in your arms that September night... The first time you ever saw me cry..._

"I missed this so much." She cried into his shirt.

Jeff patted her back. "What did you miss?" He whispered.

"You... your smile, your eyes, your skin, just you... everything about you. I missed this feeling... this feeling of everything being alright."

Jeff bite his lip, hoping that it would hold back some of his own tears.

"And you know whats the most ironic part of it all?" She looked up at him with her eyes all glossy.

"What?"

"That last year, in September... you were holding me.. like this, seeing me cry for the first time. And now your seeing it for the second time."

Jeff didn't respond, because he hadn't a clue of what to say. So he just nodded.

_Maybe this is wishful thinking... Probably mindless dreaming, If you loved again I swear I'd love you right..._

Lexi sighed, "I think this is just wishful thinking... maybe even just a fantasy at this point." She sniffled."But I swear to god, if you gave me another chance... I promise that I wouldn't fuck up again... I don't wanna lose you again."

Once again, Jeff was lost for words. He knew what to say, but the words just couldn't form together and come out of his mouth. So he just nodded again.

_I'd go back in time and change it but I can't... So if the chain is on your door, I understand._

"But if I could go back in time, I would... so I could change this an make it right, so I wouldn't have lost you in the first place." She sighed. "But I can't... and I hope you can give me another chance... but if you don't want to, I totally understand..."

_But this is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you saying 'I'm sorry' for that night... And I go back to December. It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you; wishing I'd realized what had when you were mine... I'd go back to December turn around and make it all right... I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind... I'd go back to December all the time._

Lexi laughed randomly.

"What's so funny?" Jeff demanded.

"This... this is my way of saying sorry... sorry for that night. I thought that being away from you would give me freedom... but it just made me miss you more and more." She took a deep breath. "I just wish I never left you to go to WWE... I wish I stayed in TNA... I wish I realized what I had was way better than what seemed to be better at that time."

Jeff wrapped his arms around her. "It's okay Lex... I'm here now."

"I just have to stop going back to December." She cried.

Jeff nodded. "Yes you do... live for right now. Stop going back to December... and stay in right now. Just be with me again."

She looked up and smiled. "Seriously."

He nodded then they locked lips.

"I guess going back to December all those time was worth it... It made me realize what I wanted again... and I usually get what I want."

She and Jeff laughed briefly then kissed once more.


End file.
